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Arbor Society


Details To Notice When Considering Condolences Messages

One of the ways you can express your compassion to someone who has lost their loved one is by sending them a sympathy note. Even though writing condolences messages is quite uncomfortable for most people, such a note can be quite comforting for the bereaved persons. Taking time to write them a note shows that you care about them.

Start the note by acknowledging the loss that your friend has suffered and how saddened you were by the news. Express your sympathy about their loss. You should refer to the deceased by name. If you knew the deceased, you can make a nice remark about them.

You can share memories of the person if you knew them. Be specific about the memory or loss that you share. Opt for a positive or neutral thought. If the deceased was close or special to you in a certain way, let your friend know. The survivors will appreciate the fact that their loved one meant something special to other people too.

Be simple and go straight to the point. No need to try and come up with something fancy like a poem or special message. A heartfelt note will be appreciated more. Since the recipient may get many notes during this time, they may not have the time to read through a long message.

You can end the letter by letting the person know that you are available for them. Do not offer general help, instead be specific about how you want to help. You can also let them know that they are in your thoughts and prayers. If possible, visit your friend and hand deliver the note to them.

Do not delay to send your note. Preferably do it shortly after you have learned about the loss. Take time to write out the note by hand, instead of having it typed. Sympathy messages are best written on plain paper in subtle colors rather than bold colors.


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