Basics You Should Expect When Visiting A Jewish Funeral
Respect for the deceased is exhibited by following the rules of Jewish Funeral Etiquette. The memorial service is a gathering to grieve together. Family members should be allowed to start each conversation. Then friends can share memories.
From time of death, the body of the deceased is to be observed continuously until it is buried. Usually a family member oversees the preparation for the burial ceremony. During the washing it is traditional to keep the body facing up.
Men are prepared for burial by men and women by other women. A simple white shroud is placed on the body. The men wear a prayer shawl with one tassel missing. All being interred in a simple shroud ensures the poor of receiving the same amount of dignity as the wealthy.
A wooden coffin is used because a body is supposed to turn to dust eventually. Holes are drilled in the bottom of the casket for that reason. People show sorrow by tearing at their outer clothing.
The funeral is conducted no more than 48 hours after death. Jewish custom dictates a closed casket. Prayers will be offered by a rabbi in Hebrew. Eulogies are given by the members of the family.
Everyone is expected to listen and show a reverent attitude during the ceremony. It is considered appropriate to wear conservative, dark colored clothing. Casual wear, including sandals, is not acceptable.
In most cases, only family members attend the burial at the cemetery. They next sit shiva in the following week. Flowers are not brought to the family. Instead, those who visit to offer condolences bring gifts of food.
Casseroles and other prepared meals are brought to the family because they should not be burdened with cooking at this time. Jewish Funeral Etiquette includes visitors sharing an anecdote or two of times shared with the departed. This shows that the friend will not be forgotten.