Each person grieves the passing of a loved one in their own unique way. This time may be especially stressful on the family members who are having to contain their emotions in order to make important decisions and proper interment arrangements. When all mourners follow the basic funeral etiquette guidelines, it helps to relieve some of the burden on the bereaved and allows everyone to say their personal farewells.
For the most part, one only needs to use their best discretion follow common sense in order to know what is best. There are, however, a few basic tips that everyone should know for general purposes. Keep in mind that when the deceased has left specific instructions as to what they wish mourners to do and wear at their services, or when their religion or culture have traditions in place, those wishes take precedence over all other guidelines.
Deciding what is considered proper attire for funerary services is one of the top topics of discussion. Unless there were specific style requests left by the deceased, or required by their cultural or religious beliefs, the rule of thumb is to wear something in black, dark blue, gray or deep brown which all symbolize mourning. Take care to dress conservatively to show respect and to avoid drawing attention to oneself.
It is important that one not show up late to the funerary services. If possible, try to be there about fifteen minutes early so that one has time to greet fellow mourners and still be seated before the proceedings are ready to commence. When delays are unavoidable, enter quietly and remain at the rear of the room or wait outside to avoid disturbing others.
One may offer condolences in person, through phone calls or by sending cards and letters. However they are delivered, they should be brief yet sincere messages without any well meaning advice on dealing with loss as that may be better appreciated at a later date. Most appreciate the sharing of memories as long as the deceased remains the center of focus.
Remember that the purpose for such ceremonies are to pay final respects to someone dear to all who attend and to provide an opportunity for them to share treasured memories. General funeral etiquette keeps the proceedings flowing smoothly, avoiding upsetting disruptions and maintains focus on the honored deceased. These guidelines are primarily matters of respect, discretion and common sense and can help anyone who is unsure of how to behave among the bereaved.
